Books That Will Upgrade Your Mindset and Your Life
I have always loved reading. I read a book a week at one point during my personal training days in London, as I spent a lot of time on the Tube. We had a lovely library in Canary Wharf that was a quiet space within the hustle and bustle of city life.
I had always stuck to fiction and some autobiographies, but never wandered into the elusive ‘self-help’ section.
After a break-up, a friend gave me a book, ‘It’s Called a Breakup Because It’s Broken‘, by Greg Behrend and Amiira Ruotola-Behrendt and to my surprise…it actually helped! Who knew this cynical woman could be convinced? So I have continued to reading self-help books a few times a year to fine-tune my mind, as I do with my body in the gym every week. Here I share my faves, which I know can help other women navigate life.
The Morning Miracle
“The Miracle Morning” by Hal Elrod is one of those books (and a supportive online community) I wasn’t sure about, promises about a quick morning routine that can take 7 mins and up to 1 hour, but then it seamlessly changed my life.
It promises that waking up early and doing six simple things before 8 a.m. (he calls them the “Life S.A.V.E.R.S.”) will improve every part of your existence. And as much as my inner cynic wanted to fight it, he wasn’t wrong.
Now, no matter what is going on in my life, my morning routine gives me a sense of control, calm, and clarity. I work it around what is happening, if I have an early meeting, I will do the 7 min routine, and days when I have more time, I do the whole hour. It inspired me to get up that little bit earlier, and I feel more prepared for the day. This is compared to a rushed start from getting ready, grabbing coffee, to jumping onto calls and emails, which I am sure many of you feel!
The Obstacle Is The Way
“The Obstacle Is the Way” by Ryan Holiday is basically an introduction to Stoicism. It takes all the things you’ve been complaining about (guilty!) and reframes them as opportunities to grow, learn, and get over yourself.
Inspired by the ancient Stoics, Holiday shows how setbacks aren’t just annoying roadblocks; they are the path. I picked this up when I was at a point in my life where I felt stuck, I couldn’t find the opportunity I was searching for, and that all-too-familiar feeling crept in…the sense that life was somehow unfairly stacked against me.
Now, when things go wrong (as they do), I hear this little voice saying, “Good. This is the way.” It’s annoyingly wise and incredibly grounding. Highly recommend if you need a mindset tune-up with a side of humility.
How to Win Friends & Influence People
“How to Win Friends & Influence People” by Dale Carnegie is the classic self-help book which people talk about. I read this when I worked in London and overheard someone talk about how I was always angry. This hurt deeply, because I had always felt I was a happy-go-lucky person, but London and the fast life had made me incredibly self-centred. When I talk about how this book changed my life, I am not joking!
Written in the 1930s but still weirdly relevant, it’s less about manipulation and more about learning how not to be a self-absorbed nightmare in social situations. The advice is deceptively simple…listen more, criticise less, remember names, but it works. Like it or not, Carnegie knew what he was talking about…and yes, it might just make you more likeable.
Atomic Habits
“Atomic Habits” by James Clear is the book that finally convinced me that tiny, boring changes are the secret to everything.
I picked it up in a charity shop, having heard many people talk about it. I expected it to be a fluffy productivity read, but instead got hit with a practical, science-backed guide to becoming a better version of myself (and you know I love my science-backed things!).
It’s not sexy, it’s not dramatic, but somehow the idea that “you don’t rise to the level of your goals, you fall to the level of your systems” now lives rent-free in my brain. If you’ve ever set a big goal, failed miserably, and blamed your lack of motivation, this one’s your gentle, habit-stacking slap of truth.
The Chimp Paradox
“The Chimp Paradox” by Prof. Steve Peters is a book suggested to me by some fellow personal trainers. I thought it was going to be about how to improve sports performance, but it was so much more!
Prof. Peters helps you to understand your brain and psychology in a simple way that then helps you harness it and work towards a goal that seems impossible ….and uncomfortable.
Peters explains that your brain has a “chimp”….your emotional, irrational side, and your “human”…the calm, logical adult who’s usually tied up while the chimp throws a tantrum. It’s part psychology, part therapy, and part hilarious intervention. Once you start spotting your chimp mid-rage, you can’t unsee it. It’s helped me become more compassionate, not just with myself, but with others too. I used to struggle to understand why people couldn’t stick to big life changes like quitting smoking, losing weight, or studying. Now I get it…it’s not always about willpower, and we’re all just trying to manage our inner chimp the best we can.
Final Thoughts
Most of the links to buy the books are to Amazon, but please do check your local charity shop, library or local bookstore. There are even a few online book swaps (Book Mooch) (Bookswap) so you can help the environment, save money and help others. My own motto is, when I give a book away, that once you read it give it to someone else who you feel will benefit from it.
I hope this starter list helps you uncover new ways of being to help better your life.
